(A)
Once there were two thieves who worked together. One of the thieves, Jeff, would distract people out on the street while (a) his friend would sneak into their homes and steal clothes from their bedrooms! Socks, shirts, pants, even underwear! One day, they were both caught and taken to the judge. “Which of you did the stealing?” asked the judge. “Um, I did,” said Jeff’s friend. The judge shook his head and pointed to Jeff. “And you distracted the people?”
(B)
“You just distracted people?” said the judge. “By wasting their time?” “That’s right.” The judge cleared (b) his throat. “All right then, here are your sentences: The one who stole the clothes must return them and give each person an extra piece of clothing in addition to the ones that he took.” Jeff’s friend nodded as his sentence was announced. The judge continued, “The other man must go to prison for the next ten years.”
(C)
“What!” cried the lawyer representing Jeff. “But Your Honor! I don’t understand! Why would you give such a harsh sentence to my client? After all, Jeff just wasted people’s time! (c) He never even committed a crime!” The judge replied, “His crime was greater! I gave these sentences because your client’s partner stole something that could easily be replaced―people’s clothes; but your client stole something that can never be repaid―people’s time.”
(D)
Jeff nodded in response to the question. The judge thought for a moment and then said to (d) him, “So, how did you do it? Tell me about it.” Jeff smiled, thinking the judge was going to let him go since (e) he hadn’t stolen anything. “Well, Your Honor, I would ask people about the weather, talk about sports scores, and say whatever I could to hold their attention, while that man over there took their things. You see, Your Honor, I never actually stole anything myself.”